Emily VanBerkum-Farahat is a proud USMC alumna (1T2, 1T5, and 2T3), registered Ontario social worker, and recently appointed Manager of Community Wellness at the University of St. Michael’s College. In this role, Emily develops and implements wellness programs designed to promote holistic wellbeing for the St. Michael’s community and offers resource navigation and social work services. She holds a BA (Hons) with a specialist in Christianity and Culture, an MDiv degree from the University of St. Michael’s College Faculty of Theology in the Toronto School of Theology, and a Master of Social Work degree from the University of Toronto. Emily is also the former Dean of Residence of Loretto College.
Fall is my favourite season. The trees shedding their leaves and the cooler weather creeping in evokes the feeling that change is on the horizon. The environmental change signals an opportunity for internal reflection. Fall is not merely a stop on the way to winter, but a time to reap the harvest and enjoy the hopefulness of new possibility ushered in by autumn’s bounty.
Thanksgiving, meaning “the act of giving thanks,” punctuates the fall season. It provides a break from the busyness and allows us to take stock of our lives: to ponder what needs to be shed like the tree leaves and what new possibilities await us. This time of introspection supports the development of a mindfulness practice focused on gratitude.
Research indicates that conscious awareness of thankfulness and the inclination to show appreciation has many benefits for improving or maintaining physical and mental wellbeing. Externalizing and naming that which we’re grateful for and/or talking about ourselves and our daily lives positively can bolster self-esteem, inspire optimism, change thought patterns, modify behaviour, and strengthen coping skills related to stress and anxiety.
Important considerations when incorporating a gratitude practice in your day includes doing so regularly and finding one that feels authentic to you. There are countless ways to start a personalized gratitude practice, such as journaling, mindfulness meditation (intro session offered on campus during Wellness Week- and open to all- on October 12 at 5:15pm in Charbonnel Lounge), creating a gratitude jar (and inserting three things each day that make you thankful), or designing a vision board full of personal mantras and images that inspire and help you visualize your thankfulness. When the practice is genuine and second nature, it has the empowering effect of increasing mental strength and resiliency by proactively reprogramming the brain with a mindset of growth and abundance (rather than deficit).
I have a tried and true gratitude practice that I use in conversation with friends and family. And it all started as a relationship-building tool during my time as Residence Don. Usually over a cup of tea, I’d check in with residents and ask them to tell me three specific things about their day: a “rose” (representing something positive, the day’s highlight, or small win), “bud” (a spark of joy, new experience, or something to look forward to tomorrow), and “thorn” (something challenging). It’s a simple exercise with a powerful meaning. The brain’s hardwired negativity bias accentuates what’s not working well, and minimizes the cumulative effects of simple joys,
successes, or experiences of random acts of kindness. Naming the thorniest part of the day acknowledges challenges, but the 2:1 ratio of positives to negatives balances the scale and encourages us to be more intentional about noticing the good.
By playing ‘rose, bud, thorn,’ a paradigm shift in mindset and language emerged amongst the residents that participated. Our retelling of day’s events included more self-compassion, friendships solidified as mutual support helped to navigate the lows and celebrate the highs, and the naming of emotions enabled greater self-awareness and the potential for change.
As Manager of Community Wellness and proud USMC alumna, I aspire to make positive contributions to the health and wellbeing of the diverse St. Mike’s community. With the celebration of Wellness Week (October 10-13), and recognizing World Mental Health Day on October 10, all are invited to participate in programming and initiatives designed to: destigmatize and foster dialogue about mental health (Jack Talk on October 10 at 5:15pm in the COOP), increase mental health literacy (IAR+ workshop on October 16 at 9:00am in Charbonnel Lounge), and raise awareness of SMC Wellness’ social work and resource navigation service now offered on campus.
Wellness is about cultivating daily practices that contribute to holistic health. Daily gratitude practice is an excellent contributor to overall health, and I encourage you to take note of the effects over time.
Consider trying out ‘rose, bud, thorn’ with friends and family during the Thanksgiving long weekend. Know that when you see me on campus, I’ll always be eager to play.
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